So, last night, the man and I went to the pub as he usually plays darts with his friends on a thursday. Of course, my luck, the ex was in with the pool team and therefore it was very awkward! Its a small pub so even when you don't sit together, it can be too close for comfort plus the pool table is very near the dart board. It made me realise though, being sat a foot from my man and my ex man, I loved him, I really did and although we had good times I was mostly unhappy after moving in with him, knowing we didn't want the same things. Now, I do get mad or upset, but I'm still happy so much, totally the opposite. I still feel so guilty for the hurt I caused but I can't live my life for another.
The man passed a job interview he had the other day and has training days on monday! So proud!!!
Lola
Friday 18 September 2009
Thursday 17 September 2009
Wake-up call
I very nearly had a breakdown this week. It may be something to do with the fact I returned to uni 3 days ago and now have 3 x 3000 word assignments, plus homework and reading with another assignment on the way tomorrow. This cannot be good! I actually have to pull my finger out this year and do some work. I also definately have to learn anatomy and physiology though. I thought my stomach was where my intestines are....I probably wouldn't want myself looking after my own children as a nurse! So that's this weekends research!
Not much else has been happening this week though I am going for lunch with my 2 closest friends on monday, at pizza hut with a spell of starbucks, borders books and paperchase! Good times. I may actually enjoy this year!
Met my friend Kirsty the other day for a 'drink'. Needless to say I was incredibly hungover the next day because with Kirsty, one drink is never enough lol. So much for my diet...that went out the window when I hurt myself doing exercise. I've re-started healthy eating but am scared to weigh myself for a few days!
Lola
Sunday 13 September 2009
Moving up the class system
So, sexy bum and I have just spent a weekend at his parents caravan at the golf club with them. First night, we spent at the quiz night in the club house which was so fun even though we came 2nd last...next time baby! We all ended up incredibly drunk. They decided to play golf the next day so I stayed out in the sun all day writing letters and listening to my Ipod. We were all a bit knackered last night so we stayed in with beer, played monopoly and had a laugh. I could get used to this middle class malarkey!
Back to school tomorrow. Only 2 years of uni left, dun dun dun! Its a bit kerazy how quick it's flying by. I actually have to work now too because it contributes to my final mark! ugh!
Found my old poetry and song book yesterday...some of it is pretty gay but here's one I quite like:
Goodbye, Childhood
Some think it's a goodbye
To things they once believed,
But it's about new ideas
And how they are perceived.
It's hard to let go
At first, you feel the pain
When you find a bit of wisdom,
You learn you have to lose to gain.
And so what if you're different?
And who cares about mistakes?
Just remember life is compromise,
Don't forget to give as well as take.
Give in to the inevitable,
Just walk straight through the door.
Things you've done forever
Will seem much newer than before.
At seventeen, it hits you
Eighteen, childhood disappeared.
It creeps up really quickly
Everything you feared.
But look at the world through new eyes,
Each and every day
Because once you take the world for granted
You're throwing life away
Lola x
Back to school tomorrow. Only 2 years of uni left, dun dun dun! Its a bit kerazy how quick it's flying by. I actually have to work now too because it contributes to my final mark! ugh!
Found my old poetry and song book yesterday...some of it is pretty gay but here's one I quite like:
Goodbye, Childhood
Some think it's a goodbye
To things they once believed,
But it's about new ideas
And how they are perceived.
It's hard to let go
At first, you feel the pain
When you find a bit of wisdom,
You learn you have to lose to gain.
And so what if you're different?
And who cares about mistakes?
Just remember life is compromise,
Don't forget to give as well as take.
Give in to the inevitable,
Just walk straight through the door.
Things you've done forever
Will seem much newer than before.
At seventeen, it hits you
Eighteen, childhood disappeared.
It creeps up really quickly
Everything you feared.
But look at the world through new eyes,
Each and every day
Because once you take the world for granted
You're throwing life away
Lola x
Thursday 10 September 2009
Back to school (almost!)
Thank God uni starts again on monday...I have been going mad! I actually printed off and colour coded my timetables, that is just how bored you can become!
We went to a wedding Friday just gone, the man and I. Well he went to the wedding and I went to the reception as we'd only been seeing each other for a week when he was invited and such. It was actually really good but you know, I spent all day trying to look hot, got there and spent the night being respectable and cautious with my vodka, only for my gorgeous man to try break dancing and chin himself, haha. I danced all night which I haven't done for long enough I have to say. Good times.
Currently, my parents are doing my head in, especially the mother. She slags people off for not listening then does the same. Then, this week, we've had some of her furniture in our house but since we're moving I asked what she wanted us to do with it as we had a week to be out. She said she would get back to me. Did she? Of course not, in the end I had the ring her and she sounded surprised to hear from me. For God's sake, what was she going to do, ring me the night before?! ARGH!
Good news though, I am down to my lowest BMI and weight for a long time. My BMI is now 24.24 and I started at 25.05. I seem to put on then lose but everytime I put a bit on, the number is getting less. I have however bust my knee on Wii active which I took as a sign from God to go to ASDA and buy dairylea dunkers, pepsi and oreos in copious 'on offer' amounts. Of course, I'm now sitting staring at them, putting weight on with only that action lol.
I got 6 letters from penpals in 2 days. I have become a nerd. To defeat this, I have decided to try out for cheerleading (to look like a twat) and netball (to look like a giant muscly lesbian). I am also going to definately join the music theatre society (to look like a band freak or drama gay). My life is so fulfilling haha. No offense to gays or lesbians by the way-I fully confess that, despite being straight, one day my time will come to sleep with Kylie Minogue and when it does, I shall be leaving on the other bus for homo-ville.
Oh yeah, and I have brown hair with blonde roots....obviously the Sugababes song 'sexy' is about me haha. I will fix that little problemmo tonight!
Lola x
We went to a wedding Friday just gone, the man and I. Well he went to the wedding and I went to the reception as we'd only been seeing each other for a week when he was invited and such. It was actually really good but you know, I spent all day trying to look hot, got there and spent the night being respectable and cautious with my vodka, only for my gorgeous man to try break dancing and chin himself, haha. I danced all night which I haven't done for long enough I have to say. Good times.
Currently, my parents are doing my head in, especially the mother. She slags people off for not listening then does the same. Then, this week, we've had some of her furniture in our house but since we're moving I asked what she wanted us to do with it as we had a week to be out. She said she would get back to me. Did she? Of course not, in the end I had the ring her and she sounded surprised to hear from me. For God's sake, what was she going to do, ring me the night before?! ARGH!
Good news though, I am down to my lowest BMI and weight for a long time. My BMI is now 24.24 and I started at 25.05. I seem to put on then lose but everytime I put a bit on, the number is getting less. I have however bust my knee on Wii active which I took as a sign from God to go to ASDA and buy dairylea dunkers, pepsi and oreos in copious 'on offer' amounts. Of course, I'm now sitting staring at them, putting weight on with only that action lol.
I got 6 letters from penpals in 2 days. I have become a nerd. To defeat this, I have decided to try out for cheerleading (to look like a twat) and netball (to look like a giant muscly lesbian). I am also going to definately join the music theatre society (to look like a band freak or drama gay). My life is so fulfilling haha. No offense to gays or lesbians by the way-I fully confess that, despite being straight, one day my time will come to sleep with Kylie Minogue and when it does, I shall be leaving on the other bus for homo-ville.
Oh yeah, and I have brown hair with blonde roots....obviously the Sugababes song 'sexy' is about me haha. I will fix that little problemmo tonight!
Lola x
Tuesday 1 September 2009
Falling in love again
Well, my lovely and I nearly split up this week. It was fairly awful actually. He decided it wasn't working because we were arguing all the time and he was too old for me. Like age has anything to do with it. Anyway, we talked it out for ages and got sorted.
Since then, it's been amazing, it's like we've cleared the air and are just totally loved up since. I feel like a weight has been lifted. Now I just have to lose some weight so I can buy loads of sexy lingerie for him!
We're planning a bit of a building project-his grandad was ringing the council today so I hope he's remembered!
Lola
Since then, it's been amazing, it's like we've cleared the air and are just totally loved up since. I feel like a weight has been lifted. Now I just have to lose some weight so I can buy loads of sexy lingerie for him!
We're planning a bit of a building project-his grandad was ringing the council today so I hope he's remembered!
Lola
Friday 28 August 2009
De-fatting
Well, so far I have lost 3lb in 5 days which I can't complain about. I just need to keep going despite the urge to just ram crap into my mouth.
Oh, good news, I definately do not have aids, woohoo! The GUM clinic results came back totally clear. I must be one of the only people in this town to never have known Chlamydia, haha.
I have decided to be practically perfect at uni when I go back. Not only will I work hard but I am also going to join the music theatre or performing arts society, and be sociable. I think I might actually have to go and watch La Roux in concert too. I wanted to see Dizzee Rascal (I am incredibly ashamed of myself for this) but he's sold out. Gone are my days of watching Hayley Westenra, Will Young and Donny Osmond. I am a true skank ho now. Good times-smack my bitch up and all that. I may aspire to be Jordan before long. I do feel the urge to go clubbing and flash my arse to be fair.
I feel my new aim is to get an awesome blinging outfit and do X-Factor next year. I have to sing something festival fresh though. It's definately going to be La Roux or someone like that. I need to be thin before then though. I think I have like 9 months or something til auditions. Maybe I should do a local competition first.
Keep it real
Lola x
Friday 21 August 2009
Old people suck
My boyfriend's grandparents are doing my head in! Is that awful? Two days ago, Lee plugged in the laptop for me at their house while his grandad was recording some terrible music onto usb and for no reason, it went off. Because it was blatantly the end of the world, his grandad proceeced to tell him how everything he touches goes to hell and how he is stupid, blah blah blah. I nearly lost my rag-how dare he critisise the most important person in my life, who is brilliant in every way! Everything thing you say, he has to answer back to and whenever Lee buys him anything, he's full of ingratitude. I could take his face off sometimes. They always go on about how 'precious and talented' Lee's brother is and give Lee no credit. It pure fucks me off I'm telling you.
Anyway, GUM clinic today. Ok, I was fairly traumatised when the nurse showed me the giant piece of metal she was going to ply me apart with but....it wasn't that bad. I'm totally not worried about having a smear now and we do not have genital warts-wahey! Got tested for other stuff that we don't have most likely but better to be safe than sorry. You get 20 free condoms for getting tested. Woohoo! It costs £3 for 3 in ASDA. At least I can come of this pill for a month and lose some weight although my new exercise game for Wii is going well-I'm actually sore from putting effort in!
Went to Vindolanda and other Roman places yesterday. We saw where Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves was filmed too. It was a nice day out, pretty boring but I wanted to take Lee as a treat since he's into all that stuff. I mostly enjoyed all the walking and fresh air. We gone from bloody Jordan and Peter to Richard and Judy in one short step.
Still working on the Kate Bush tribute. I think getting my boobs out will add to the excitement.
Lola Lovehoe
Anyway, GUM clinic today. Ok, I was fairly traumatised when the nurse showed me the giant piece of metal she was going to ply me apart with but....it wasn't that bad. I'm totally not worried about having a smear now and we do not have genital warts-wahey! Got tested for other stuff that we don't have most likely but better to be safe than sorry. You get 20 free condoms for getting tested. Woohoo! It costs £3 for 3 in ASDA. At least I can come of this pill for a month and lose some weight although my new exercise game for Wii is going well-I'm actually sore from putting effort in!
Went to Vindolanda and other Roman places yesterday. We saw where Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves was filmed too. It was a nice day out, pretty boring but I wanted to take Lee as a treat since he's into all that stuff. I mostly enjoyed all the walking and fresh air. We gone from bloody Jordan and Peter to Richard and Judy in one short step.
Still working on the Kate Bush tribute. I think getting my boobs out will add to the excitement.
Lola Lovehoe
Tuesday 18 August 2009
And the beat goes on
Big week this week-GUM clinic on friday, oh yessah! Of course it was slightly humiliating when I went in to make an appointment and sitting next to the receptionist was a girl from my year at school on placement. Great, now the whole world knows I have herpes. My dreams are coming true. To make it worse, the receptionist decided to ask if we needed any condoms. To be fair, I think it's a bit late for that.
Decided to surprise my boyfriend at the pub for last orders on his darts night (not a great surprise but you know) and just as my mum drove away, noticed my ex with his back to me. Not only that, he picked it as the perfect moment to come to the bar....as my gayboy was walking round the corner and shouted at me to get him a drink. It's a wonder I don't take crystal meths to be perfectly honest.
Thank God my placement is finished though, I was ready to top myself. There is only so many times you can way babies and watch women breastfeed. I totally want to have a baby. I wonder what would happen if I forgot to take my pill for like, a year or so. This hips were totally made for birthing, even more so now that I've totally fatted up. I really need to lose this weight, I'm feeling very Vanessa Feltz.
My dream this week is to be a Kate Bush tribute act...if someone knows where I can get a Viking outfit, let me know. I'm also planning to marry José Mourinho. I really can't be bothered to work so I think becoming a WAG is my only option. Or I could make a sex video....mmm STI publicity.
Watch this space Hos!
Lola Love-hoe x
Decided to surprise my boyfriend at the pub for last orders on his darts night (not a great surprise but you know) and just as my mum drove away, noticed my ex with his back to me. Not only that, he picked it as the perfect moment to come to the bar....as my gayboy was walking round the corner and shouted at me to get him a drink. It's a wonder I don't take crystal meths to be perfectly honest.
Thank God my placement is finished though, I was ready to top myself. There is only so many times you can way babies and watch women breastfeed. I totally want to have a baby. I wonder what would happen if I forgot to take my pill for like, a year or so. This hips were totally made for birthing, even more so now that I've totally fatted up. I really need to lose this weight, I'm feeling very Vanessa Feltz.
My dream this week is to be a Kate Bush tribute act...if someone knows where I can get a Viking outfit, let me know. I'm also planning to marry José Mourinho. I really can't be bothered to work so I think becoming a WAG is my only option. Or I could make a sex video....mmm STI publicity.
Watch this space Hos!
Lola Love-hoe x
Thursday 23 July 2009
The one where it all begins
Greetings nudes and nudettes,
I am starting this blog to follow my life as I spiral from merely suicidal to Michael Jackson-esque. That is, my version of suicidal, which is rocking in the corner, crying while listening to Miley Cyrus.
So, about me:
I am 22 next week and a student. I live with my boyfriend who I moved in with after 2 days....that is after I split up with my boyfriend of 2 years 2 days before....it's all very Jane Austen. I have the worst health of a vaguely healthy person in the world. This week alone, thanks to NHS.UK, I have diagnosed myself with diabetes, Chronic Fatigue Syndrome, Swine Flu and cancer. Basically, I'm going to die. To top it all off, I am starting this blog on the advice of my singing teacher, who I shall name MileyHater (she evidently has no taste in music) despite the fact she is a terrible influence and to top it all off, I am becoming more aware of the fact that she realises any dare or challenge she poses, I will attempt in some manner to achieve. This is never good. It is more than slightly disturbing that she told me to leave my boyfriend and run off with my new boyfriend. We all know how that panned out.
I have a new lifetime goal every week-this week it is to get through my 22nd birthday without stripping or flashing my boobs, shrieking 'ooa ooa', which invariably happens every year, apart from the year I felt it more appropriate to steal a toilet seat from my local and pose with it around my neck. That may have been the low point of my life. I'd also like to grow my fingerprint back after an unfortunate hair straightener accident several days ago.
The most positive part of my life is my new love and he makes it all worthwhile. After 3 days together, I cemented our love by getting mortal and vomiting all over him before promptly concussing myself. He decided to pay me back by informing me last week he had warts on his penis and I would have to go to the GUM clinic. Upon my fury, he said "It's ok for you, I have to have a swab shoved down my jap's eye, women love having stuff up there, it's like a tickle stick for you!" I tried to explain that being swabbed or having a smear is not like an audience with Ken Dodd but I could tell he didn't believe me.
It's also scary how we are rapidly turning into Katie and Peter. We originally started off like Ali G and Me Julie, i.e. rampant, moved into a Richard and Judy phase (some slight arguing) before ending up where we are now. Our conversation last week went something like this:
Me: Why do you never listen to me?
Him: What?
Me: You're f****** cheating on me, aren't you? Don't even deny it!
Him: Whatever I said in response, you're going to freak aren't you?
Me: I'm f***ing leaving (storms off and packs a bag).
Him: Where are you going?
Me: To my mum's, I think we should see other people.
Him: OK. What do you want for tea?
Me: (putting bag down) What have we got?
Him: Pizza?
Me: yay! I love you.
You see my point.
So, if the story you were looking for was following a tragic heroine on the road to ruin, this blog is the one for you!
Love Love-Hoe x
I am starting this blog to follow my life as I spiral from merely suicidal to Michael Jackson-esque. That is, my version of suicidal, which is rocking in the corner, crying while listening to Miley Cyrus.
So, about me:
I am 22 next week and a student. I live with my boyfriend who I moved in with after 2 days....that is after I split up with my boyfriend of 2 years 2 days before....it's all very Jane Austen. I have the worst health of a vaguely healthy person in the world. This week alone, thanks to NHS.UK, I have diagnosed myself with diabetes, Chronic Fatigue Syndrome, Swine Flu and cancer. Basically, I'm going to die. To top it all off, I am starting this blog on the advice of my singing teacher, who I shall name MileyHater (she evidently has no taste in music) despite the fact she is a terrible influence and to top it all off, I am becoming more aware of the fact that she realises any dare or challenge she poses, I will attempt in some manner to achieve. This is never good. It is more than slightly disturbing that she told me to leave my boyfriend and run off with my new boyfriend. We all know how that panned out.
I have a new lifetime goal every week-this week it is to get through my 22nd birthday without stripping or flashing my boobs, shrieking 'ooa ooa', which invariably happens every year, apart from the year I felt it more appropriate to steal a toilet seat from my local and pose with it around my neck. That may have been the low point of my life. I'd also like to grow my fingerprint back after an unfortunate hair straightener accident several days ago.
The most positive part of my life is my new love and he makes it all worthwhile. After 3 days together, I cemented our love by getting mortal and vomiting all over him before promptly concussing myself. He decided to pay me back by informing me last week he had warts on his penis and I would have to go to the GUM clinic. Upon my fury, he said "It's ok for you, I have to have a swab shoved down my jap's eye, women love having stuff up there, it's like a tickle stick for you!" I tried to explain that being swabbed or having a smear is not like an audience with Ken Dodd but I could tell he didn't believe me.
It's also scary how we are rapidly turning into Katie and Peter. We originally started off like Ali G and Me Julie, i.e. rampant, moved into a Richard and Judy phase (some slight arguing) before ending up where we are now. Our conversation last week went something like this:
Me: Why do you never listen to me?
Him: What?
Me: You're f****** cheating on me, aren't you? Don't even deny it!
Him: Whatever I said in response, you're going to freak aren't you?
Me: I'm f***ing leaving (storms off and packs a bag).
Him: Where are you going?
Me: To my mum's, I think we should see other people.
Him: OK. What do you want for tea?
Me: (putting bag down) What have we got?
Him: Pizza?
Me: yay! I love you.
You see my point.
So, if the story you were looking for was following a tragic heroine on the road to ruin, this blog is the one for you!
Love Love-Hoe x
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